How We Got Started In Homeschooling
By Sun Kyu Bae |
Published April 10, 2009 |
Articles |
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Track our thoughts and events that led us to joining the education revolution!
Our Great Mistake
However, despite his sight issues, Ryan (and Lauren) quickly picked up phonics and basic reading skills at a neighborhood academic center for pre-schoolers. And we thought that the major hurdle of succeeding in Kindergarten was largely behind us – if the kids could already read when they started Kindergarten, the rest should be a breeze…we could not have been more wrong, and the following illustrates our mistake.
Lauren and Ryan were enrolled in our local elementary school. We notified Ryan’s teacher of his sight issue and he was immediately referred to other support programs within the school system that could help with his sight problem. Serina signed the release on letting the school conduct assessments, and we both honestly thought these assessments were to assess his vision only. Things seemed to go well since the kids were telling us how they enjoyed school. However, about a month into Kindergarten, we got a call from the school to pick up Lauren for some reason we can’t remember. When Serina got to school, she saw Ryan at the school administration office, looking the most depressed as ever – he was hunched over on a chair, just not really moving at all. She went up to Ryan, thinking we would be happy to see her.
“Ryan, it’s mommy”, she called cheerfully, hoping he would cheer up.
He didn’t respond. He just sat there head down and hunched over. Serina asked the administrative staff what was going on with Ryan and they referred her to the school counselor. She had a meeting that went something like this (the discussion below represents paraphrasing):
School Counselor: We conducted assessments on Ryan and although he tested well above his peers in verbal skills, we think he may have some form of autism and recommend that you consult your doctor to get a professional diagnosis.
Serina: (Restraining herself from outburst but giving the counselor some benefit of doubt) What is it that makes you think that?
School Counselor: He’s unusually quiet in class and doesn’t like to interact with anyone – it’s already been a month and he still seems uncomfortable with his peers. Also, he always looks down, doesn’t like to look directly at you, which is a tell-tale sign. Also, according to our assessment, he seems a bit too focused on certain themes when he’s talking….for example, he mentions that the thing he likes the most is the Haunted Mansion ride and the thing he dislikes the most is Pirates of the Caribbean ride because there is a part of the ride that the boat goes down.
Serina: Well, I thought you were assessing Ryan for his visual problems…why are you assessing him for autism; I didn’t think this was a factor…
School Counselor: When you signed the release, you permitted the school district to assess Ryan for his visual AND psychological state.
Serina: (Getting visibly perturbed) Well, I didn’t realize that when signing the release because the context that was discussed between me and the school was only referring to his visual issues. But beside the point, how long have you been assessing Ryan?
School Counselor: For the last two wee-
Serina: Two weeks?! And when have you been testing him, during class?
School Counselor: Yes, we pull him out for around ½ hr – 1 hr, depending on the assessment needed.
Serina: So, you expect a kid to be comfortable with his peers when he’s being pulled out during class for half of the time he’s been enrolled in Kindergarten?! Why would you expect him to feel comfortable around his peers if he’s not being treated like them?” Also, (furious at the verge of tears at this point) don’t you know that Ryan’s sight issue results in the fact that he cannot look up directly in the eyes at somebody…he can see the best out of the left side of his left eye, causing him to tilt his head to the right whenever he wants to look at you – but it physically is uncomfortable for him to do that, the doctors can confirm this with you if you want.
School Counselor: Well, I was just told that he had visual issues and didn’t know anything about-
Serina: And the reason why he talks about Haunted House so much is because he likes it. We have annual passes to Disneyland and we go there on a weekly basis and he loves it. Same reason for Pirates, he doesn’t like dips…so what’s wrong with that?!
School Counselor: Well, boys his age like to talk about baseball, not-
Serina: (Furious) HIS VISION ISSUE DOESN’T MAKE BASEBALL A REALISTIC THING FOR HIM TO PURSUE SINCE HE CAN’T SEE AS WELL! DOESN’T THAT JUST MAKE COMMON SENSE?!?
School Counselor: Well, based on our assessment, we recommend that for Ryan’s sake, that he’s best fitted for our Special Program, where we only have 4 students at the moment and plenty of attention. In fact, we have 5 teachers ready in the program so Ryan should get one-on-one support. You have to understand Mrs. Bae, that his current teacher has over 20 students to teach at once and it makes it especially difficult if-
Serina: (Forming tears) If Ryan is dragging the whole class down?!
School Counselor: Please don’t take this the wrong way Mrs. Bae, we’re all here to do what’s best for Ryan and-
Serina: (Whispering and exasperated) I...will...not…have my son in a Special Program. So what are the next steps here?
School Counselor: Well, the Principal along with the assessors would like to have a conference with you…
Serina didn’t hear the rest, because she was just picturing how that meeting would go, with her sitting in the center and all the assessors and the Principal on their side trying to persuade her to get Ryan into the Special Program. Now, let’s make it clear here that we don’t have anything against the Special Program, but both of us knew in our hearts that placing him there would just be another administrative mistake – he would in effect be another headcount that’s great for the school since it would ensure more funds for their budget and therefore, justify the teachers teaching in the program – but prospects for Ryan to realize his full potential in this program was dismal at best – this was how we were exposed to the public school system.
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